Making Decisions

This so true! I now have evidence to back up my previous post on how we make choices :-)


Making Decisions

Making decisions by rolling the dice
is safe as a house on fire, steady a stand
as walking on water or dancing on ice.

Think it all over and check it out twice
all of the facts are not at your command,
so make your decisions by rolling the dice.

All our inventions have made no device
for seeing the future. Whatever you planned
is walking on water and dancing on ice.

No matter how hard you work, you'll be surprised
so whatever happens, you must understand
it always comes down to just rolling the dice.

So pull out a quarter and cover your eyes,
toss it and catch on the back of your hand,
walk on the water and dance on the ice.

Prophecy comes at a terrible price,
best write your future on wind-drifted sand,
make your decisions by rolling the dice,
walk on the water and dance on the ice.

Yet another dreamy poem

Alive With Love

I have died a thousand times this day,
A million since I first saw your face;
Paralyzed
Frozen
Overwhelmed
to the point where tears no longer flow.

I am so alive with love
I can no longer live like a normal person.

-- Catherine Seress (Bharati)

Beautiful .. isn't it?

The Glow of Your Presence

This one made my day!

I never really cared for the things of this world.
It was the glow of your presence
that filled it with beauty.
-- Hafiz

Another Rumi classic ...

I had a chance to re-read this poem today. You cannot help being deeply moved by Rumi! Someday, I'll read this to the woman in my life :-)

-o-o-o-

In the early morning hour,
just before dawn, lover and beloved wake
and take a drink of water.

She asks, “Do you love me or yourself more?
Really, tell the absolute truth.”

He says, “There's nothing left of me.
I’m like a ruby held up to the sunrise.
Is it still a stone, or a world
made of redness? It has no resistance
to sunlight.”

-- Rumi

Dreamy poems

Reading HP makes you think mystically. I re-read this poem after a long time and found it even more fascinating this time around. Makes you imagine a fairy land ... I need to grow up!

Ithaca

When you set out on your journey to Ithaca,
pray that the road is long,
full of adventure, full of knowledge.
The Lestrygonians and the Cyclops,
the angry Poseidon -- do not fear them:
You will never find such as these on your path,
if your thoughts remain lofty, if a fine
emotion touches your spirit and your body.
The Lestrygonians and the Cyclops,
the fierce Poseidon you will never encounter,
if you do not carry them within your soul,
if your soul does not set them up before you.

Pray that the road is long.
That the summer mornings are many, when,
with such pleasure, with such joy
you will enter ports seen for the first time;
stop at Phoenician markets,
and purchase fine merchandise,
mother-of-pearl and coral, amber and ebony,
and sensual perfumes of all kinds,
as many sensual perfumes as you can;
visit many Egyptian cities,
to learn and learn from scholars.

Always keep Ithaca in your mind.
To arrive there is your ultimate goal.
But do not hurry the voyage at all.
It is better to let it last for many years;
and to anchor at the island when you are old,
rich with all you have gained on the way,
not expecting that Ithaca will offer you riches.

Ithaca has given you the beautiful voyage.
Without her you would have never set out on the road.
She has nothing more to give you.

And if you find her poor, Ithaca has not deceived you.
Wise as you have become, with so much experience,
you must already have understood what Ithacas mean.

-- Constantine P. Cavafy

A much better day

When you start the day watching HP on IMAX, it has to be good! The last 20 minutes or so was stunning in 3D. The ups were Sirius Black, Luna Lovegod, Umbridge and an awesome background score. Downs included a rather slim Dudley, an overdose of Harry and a subdued Draco.

Better things awaited me as the morning progressed! Asha Seattle volunteers raised $24,191 since 2006 through 1,423 hours of volunteering activities. Microsoft contributes $17 for every hour of volunteering! This is by far the best perk I've received here (yes, it beats free soda, unlimited Starbucks coffee and chocolate milk).

I was on a high and really glad to have been able to drive this over the past year and make sure people get credit for what they do! Now the sights are for the Give campaign!

A Nameless Poem

Someday, I'll write happier poems!


A Nameless poem

Peering into frothy lager, thoughts rush up my head
Things could be so different now, but here I am instead.

Her twinkling eyes, that radiant smile ... that turned many a thousand head
My crushed heart, the drowning cries ... can we please make amend?

Refusing to move on, I cling on to the happy memories past,
Standing aboard the sinking ship, I look up at its mast.

Did I act too quickly, or did I rush at her?
Was I too consumed in my own affairs ... and not feel her fear?

If I could wish for just one thing, I'd want to go back in time,
I'd try again, yet another time, just try to make her mine.

Or maybe I tried too hard, 'twas too much effort you see,
Clasped the water in my palms ... believing it would be with me!

Letting go of my baggage, can I ever again be the real me?
Life's biggest teachers leave scars for all to see.

-- Palani

Musings from India: D-Day!

Its official now - Swami and Niru are man and wife! It's the first big occassion in the family after a very long time and it was a very memorable event for all of us.

Enjoy the snaps from the engagement, reception and the wedding!

Musings from India: Marriage rituals

Listening to elders in the family talk about customs and traditions associated with the pre-marriage rituals tends to blur the lines between the real and the unreal. While my rational part of my mind seeks to find the reasoning, the irrational part chooses to not to sift the lores from the logic.


Leading upto the the marriage, we had several pujas at home, starting with the Sumangali(a woman whose husband is alive, or was alive during her lifetime) puja. This puja is done in honor of the departed Sumangalis from our extended family. On this occassion, the mangalyam ("thaali"), which is to be tied around the bride's neck, is worshipped and blessings are sought to esnure that the new bride and groom have a long married life together. Friday was chosen as it is an auspicious day and our home was filled with floral decorations, delicious food and several relatives and guests.


On Saturday, we had the "Thaluvu" to seek the blessings from Lord Venkateshwara (Vishnu). We started the day early and had a "naamam" painted on our foreheads. As part of the custom, the males in the family need to seek alms (of rice) from the neighbors. This rice is then used to prepare 5 different rice dishes and offered to the Lord. We made tamarind rice, lemon rice, pongal, sweet pongal and curd rice.




Sunday was fun - we had 2 pujas that day. In the morning it was the Maariyaatha puja dedicated to Mariamma, the Goddess of well-being. She is the guardian against illnesses, particularly measles and chicken pox. During summer months when these diseases are most virulent, this Goddess is placated. Villages typically have large gatherings near temples where women make "koozhu" (a semi-solid dish made from boiled rice and ragi) and distribute them. Notice the right-most vessel containing the koozhu alongside with karamani kozhambhu, plantain, kootu, kozhukattai and keerai. Yummy!


Finally, we had the Muneeswara puja in the afternoon. If you drive by the villages, chances are you'd see a large statue of this God at the outskirts. He is a well-built, fearsome looking God with a large mustache and is often seen riding a horse. He is feared as much as He is revered. This nocturnally-active God is supposed to protect people from the things that they fear most, especially at night. Interestingly, unlike other Hindu Gods, people traditionally serve cigars, toddy (an alcoholic drink) and non-vegetarian food as part of the offerings! At our house, it was just the cigars :-) Some of the relatives who were gathered there claimed to have seen Him at nights. I was fascinated to listen to the several first-person accounts about sightings of him at night. It all seemed so unreal.


On a different note, I'm off to Chennai tomorrow morning for the wedding. We're so close to the D-Day. My brother is getting married ... I cannot believe that we've all grown up so quickly and ready to start our own families. The days that we went to school together, played cricket on the streets and fought over the silliest of things seem like yesterday! Time indeed flies ... or rather times fly.

Musings from India: 30 decibels more

Two days into my vacation, I see two different Indias. The dreamy one that I knew as a kid until I left for the US in 2002; the other is a "Wal-mart"-ized India that has burgeoned ever since. In spite of the contrast, the common theme is that everything is atleast 30 decibels more in India when compared to the US :-) Everything around me seems louder now - the traffic, crowds, stores and the crows! My eardrums have been trying hard to re-caliberate their acceptable threshold values.

On a different note, the retailing phenemenon has really taken off in India. Giant stores selling everything from cheap plastic goods to appliances, clothes to condiments, spices to cigarettes ... all under under one roof. It is sad to see this killing the shopping experience - the kind I thoroughly enjoyed during my childhood. A trip to the local grocer meant clutching my dad's hand and walking through the narrow lanes in the bazaar. The sights and sounds were so earthy. One could smell camphor, spices, jasmine, soaps and numerous other aromas drifting in cramped, grimy, dimly-lit one-roomed stores. Dad and mom would hold the grocery list while keeping an eye on the scales and carrying a conversation with the owner. Compare this with rows and rows of crowded shelves, automated weighing machines and the impersonal touch to every transaction!

Sigh, I guess I'm still stuck in microcosm of pre-2002 India. However, the redeeming part of the experience was that the personal touch wasn't completely lost. The sense of community, connectedness and being part of one big family has been one of the country's biggest charm! My local barber recognized me immediately even after all these years and we chatted about old times, family and careers. He still knows how I liked my hair styled. This was followed by a trip to my one-roomed house where we grew up. It brought back memories of my early childhood.



I met my cousin's kids after a very long time. They've grown up so quickly! We hit off really well.



More on the rituals and poojas in my next post ...

Musings from India: The arrival

YES! I've made it on time for the mango season yet again this year ... and it's two good crops in a row! Oh, I forgot all about Swami and Niru's marriage: it's happening on the 17th in Chennai.

The journey this time was comparatively uneventful: no missed connections, delays or missed bags. Mom was mighty pleased that the stars were looking good during this trip when the last one was such a nightmare.

The halt at Singapore was fun - the duty free shops are aplenty, but expensive. It is a very clean city! We had a cruise at the Singapore river where I had a chance to show off my spanking new D40 SLR.

Since I had requested my "welcome dish" well in advance, there were no surprises! Urundai (round) kozhambhu and Malgova mambazham (mango)! Strangely enough I cannot explain either of them to my friends (yes, even some Tamilian ones). Urundai kozhambhu is composed of lentil dumplings dipped in tangy, tamarind-laden sauce. It goes well with plain rice, salt and water (for an even heightened taste, try old rice leftovers). Malgova is a special variety of mangoes that comes from Salem, characterized by it's unique texture and larger than average seed. It was a trip down memory lane as Periamma served it on my hand, much like the days when numerous cousins would sit at the terrace of our family home and the elders would place balls of rice and curry on our palms!

After 4 hours of sleep, we woke up the next day to a pooja at home. It was fun to see so many people at home - kids, elders and family - all doing their thing. Needless to say, the food was good! Then there was a power nap, shopping for clothes, and muscling your way thro' Bangalore's traffic crawls.

Hmm .... I'm tired now, got to sleep. Another long day tomorrow filled with more shopping, guests and pooja. And more food. If I manage to eat at this rate, I will be rolling back to Seattle in in style ... much like the beloved "Urundai" ;)

Back to source ...

Classic Rumi ...

whatever happens
to the world around
show me your purpose
show me your source

even if the world
is Godless and chaos
show me your anchor
show me your love

if there is hunger
if there is famine
show me your harvest
show me your resource

if life is bitter
everywhere snakes everywhere poison
show me your garden
show me your meadow

if the sun and the moon fall
if darkness rules the world
show me your light
show me your flame

if i have no mouth
or tongue to utter
words of your secrets
show me your fountain

i'll keep silence
how can i express
your life when mine
still is untold

-- Rumi

It's been over 15 years since I last wrote a poem on my own. It took me 15 minutes to write this one in the morning. I had this on my mind for a very long time, it just need the pen to talk to the paper!

Someday, I'll write happier poems :-)


The Storm

"Why am I all alone?", cried the droplet in distress,
When the mighty river meanders far and wide,
Therein lie all my friends splashing and frolicking
While I am left to die

We spent so much time together,
Meeting new friends from stream and the lake,
Caressing the winds that swept our path,
And tugging the lonely boat in its wake

The days that we spent fighting,
Merry laughter, banter, and that naughty lie,
Yet when the time came for us to be together,
While I am left to die

"Why me?" asked the droplet,
Unable to comprehend,
Why must I live a life condemned
While the others have a friend?

Brooding at the heavens above,
It looked at the Gods with a sigh,
Praying for that faint ray of hope,
While I am left to die

The Maker gave a faint smile,
As He looked down at His child,
She was still broken and weeping,
The storm was raging ... the wind was howling wild.

The droplet was still musing
Of the days when they would lie,
Dreaming of their unfulfilled dreams,
While I am left to die

"You're never alone", said the Maker,
As the storm did subside,
The sun was out and the droplet went home.
"Sometimes you need to wait a while!"

-- Palani

In the driver's seat

I've become sort-of-queer these days. For over a month now, at 32F weather, I open the moonroof and glassed of my car and drive on the freeways. Day and night, sun and moon, to work and back. It's such a liberating feeling, with cool wind in my hair and a song in the background .... ah life's precious moments.

It's so much fun .... a song for the mood:

I'm singing in the rain
Just singing in the rain
What a glorious feelin'
I'm happy again
I'm laughing at clouds
So dark up above
The sun's in my heart
And I'm ready for love
Let the stormy clouds chase
Everyone from the place
Come on with the rain
I've a smile on my face
I walk down the lane
With a happy refrain
Just singin',Singin' in the rain
Dancin' in the rain

Photoshopped animals

Thanks to Digg! These pictures are just incredible: http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=21785

Gives a whole new meaning to elephant seals :-)

Life's little choices

Looking back at your life so far, have you ever wondered about what prompted you to make those little choices in life? Your likes and dislikes, your favorite color, your favorite animal, your favorite dish? How does it feel a few years later? Do you still feel logic, reasoning and sound rationale was the biggest deciding factor? Hmmm ... Well think hard again!

I spend a bit of of time every now and then introspection (some would argue that its a little more than the national average, but I couldn't care less) about this. I've come to the conclusion that while the biggest decisions (career and job) were sort of (notice I didn't say completely) backed by rationale, most of my petty likes and dislikes evolved from nowhere! My brother is only a year older than me ... and as a result of peer pressure, rebelliousness, and more importantly, to appear cooler - we'd fight over almost everything. Mom and dad did everything within their powers to make sure we never fought - they'd even get the same book labels, lunch boxes, bags and dresses (I remember the times when we'd make faces if the others' dress cost even a wee bit more than your's while shopping at Chellarams, our family store in Majestic).

I thought whales were the kings of the ocean, he claimed sharks were better. I liked the buses and lorries made by Ashok Leyland, while he preferred the Tatas. We'd spend hours sitting atop the famous double-decker buses ... route number 131 and 134 ... jostling in our seats to see who'd count more buses from our favorite bus maker (I still believe Ashok Leyland is better because the double deckers themselves were made by them ;)). My brother thought bedsheets were cool, while I liked blankets. This was re-inforced so much that for many years I wouldn't sleep without my favorite black blanket (I hope amma has saved this for me). I still think he liked my dad more and I loved my mom a little bit more as a kid. The competiton spilled over to food too. He loved jehangiris ... and while I secretly might have liked them at some point, I decided to settle for its lesser cousin, the jalebis for good. He made up more stories with lion as the villain, while I tried to convince him that unlike the reckless tiger, a lion would never kill unless it was really hungry and wanted food. With movies stars (Kamal Vs. Rajini) and cricketers (Dravid Vs. Ganguly), our fights got only more violent and drawn out.

So how much do you think these choices affect you? My brother likes sharks even to this day, while I still think they're lean-and-mean compared to the gentle giants. I still prefer lions over tigers, blankets over bedsheets, jalebis over jehangiris, Leylands over Tatas, violet over black and Kamal over Rajini.

Deeper down, my life's little choices were fiercely driven by the desire to appear different from those around you. I think it's probably true for my brother as well and he still stands by his choices. He won't even consider crossing-over to my side on these matters!

As for Ganguly, he's still the Bengal tiger .... errr lion who's better than Dravid!

The Secret Is Out

W. H. Auden (1907-1973) writes delightful poetry for no rhyme or reason :-) Here's why I think he's a genius - the flow is fantastic!

The Secret Is Out

At last the secret is out, as it always must come in the end,
The delicious story is ripe to tell to the intimate friend;
Over the tea-cups and in the square the tongue has its desire;
Still waters run deep, my dear, there’s never smoke without fire.
Behind the corpse in the reservoir, behind the ghost on the links,
Behind the lady who dances and the man who madly drinks,
Under the look of fatigue, the attack of migraine and the sigh
There is always another story, there is more than meets the eye.
For the clear voice suddenly singing, high up on the cement wall,
The scent of the elder bushes, the sporting prints in the hall,
The croquet matches in summer, the handshake, the cough, the kiss,
There is always a wicked secret, a private reason for this.

Over the fence

Love is powerful!

I almost thought this article was an urban legend like so many incredible stories that float around in email forward chains. Sounds too good to be true ... just imagine the chances of this happening!

I checked up the story as much as I could and it appears to be true. This incident is now being made as a motion picture.

Life is indeed beautiful!